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Single Parents and Online Dating

Making the decision to begin frinend dating again can be an overwhelming experience for any single parent. There’s a lot at stake beyond the future of love in your life. After all, you have others who depend on you now. But life, like love, comes with risk and reward. Love is one of the greatest reasons to live life and its certainly worth taking chances for. Here are some suggestions for single parents looking to start dating online.

Its important to be open and honest in everything that you do as a single parent, online or off. Honesty should be the block we build our lives on so it makes sense to bring that into our relationships. As a parent, this means being up front about your choice to date again. Dating is a natural part of life and its not something to be hidden. Deceit damages relationships. You don’t want lies to tear apart the love within your family that you have worked so hard to build. Plus, single parents who have tried online dating know that it can be an involved process. Dating and romance will once again become a part of your life and it doesn’t make sense to leave out those closest to you. Certainly, a level of restraint would be appropriate, depending on the age of your children. But when it comes to love, nobody should be denied the opportunity to date. An open an honest approach is best when single parents decide to venture into online dating again.

As important as honesty is for single parents, online dating also requires openness. Being open allows people to make informed judgment on you as a single parent looking for love. Having a child has a huge impact on relationships so it doesn’t do anyone any good not to be upfront about it. There are certain aspects of life that other people shouldn’t need to know about at least not at first. Kids aren’t one of them. Single parents should be open about their children if they expect to attract the right kind of partner when dating online.

“Online dating provides an easy way to get back in the game without returning to the bar and club scene.”

Online dating for single parents is a choice of the parent, not the child. Your children dictate much of your life and they always will, but love is deeply personal and nobody has the right to say how it manifests itself in your life. A child’s opinions are important, but they should not have the power to determine how and when you are available for romance.

Once you’ve made the decision to begin online dating, there are some nuts and bolts of the process that you should consider. The most glaring consideration of online dating for single parents is whether or not to post a picture. There are a number of factors that could come into play that would warrant discretion. However, it needs to be said that you will have many more options open to you if you add a picture to your online dating profile. Another thing you’ll need to consider is how you will deal with love interests around your house and children. The best approach is usually a cautious one. Until your children have reached a mature level of understanding, bringing many people home might not be the best approach. Keep your dates away from your children until you’ve developed a serious relationship. A little bit of forethought like this before you get back into the online dating scene as a single parent will save you trouble down the line.

Dating shouldn’t be taboo for single parents. Online dating provides an easy way to get back in the game without returning to the bar and club scene. As is evident on this site, there are a number of different dating sites to choose from. Finding love as a single parent in the online dating world should be easy, and by following these few tips and finding a site worth surfing, romance will be calling at your doorstep before you know it!

Why Rules Aren’t Always Meant To Be Broken

In the last few years, a number of self-proclaimed “bibles for dating” claim to have discovered “simple rules” to follow in order to land a man and keep him have sold like hotcakes to the female demographic. In response, a number of self-help handbooks have been written for men to exploit “the rules” taught to women and twist them around to their own advantage. Sounds like an unholy war replete with espionage, counter-espionage, tactical manoeuvres, hostages taken, prisoners liberated and of course, one side or the other becoming the ultimate victor. There’s just one problem: isn’t the point of dating to share some of your life with someone, not deceitfully win some sort of unseen battle?
I know, I know, we didn’t start the fire. Regardless, we are in the here and now, where gender roles have been turned on their heads. We’re still clinging desperately to old ideas about men and women in the hopes of better understanding the opposite sex. The problem is times change faster than the attitudes of most people and what may be politically correct isn’t always what people realistically want. The other problem is that somewhere along the way, we have confused being the same with being equal. Without delving into a great philosophical debate, it’s pretty obvious that as much as men and women may be equal, they will never be the same. It’s kind of what seems to make the world go around. You can’t have your black without white or even the chance of developing some grey areas in between without there being some strong contrasting colours.
Admitting that men and women are different is the first step. Realizing that it is easier to understand people like us than people who are different is the second step. Not very politically correct to admit either as fact, but that’s only because we also seem to confuse acceptance and respect with understanding. I will never understand quantum theory, but I still acknowledge its existence and respect the scientific advances that have resulted from its study. So it is with man and woman and in reality each individual in this world, you may never fully understand one another, but that doesn’t mean you can’t respect and accept each other.
Let’s get back to the often-maligned rules. Dating is sometimes thought of as a game, hence the idea of there being rules. How many profiles start out by saying how the person, male or female, doesn’t like to play games? Here in lies the ruse. Saying you don’t play games is already playing the game. There is no escaping it. Your only option is to understand it a bit and then to learn to respect and accept it. As children, why do we play games? Ideally it’s not supposed to be to win, but rather it teaches us to interact with other children in a healthy and productive manner. The best players are as good at winning as they are at losing. The best daters accept rejection as well as attraction.
That is the point of the game in dating. It’s not to win or lose, but it’s supposed to facilitate social communication with a complete stranger. Having rules is merely a way to let both parties know in advance what the next move in the process should be. One reason people lose at games is they don’t know the rules them. Too many times, we don’t ask other people what they expect or reveal to them our next move since we worry that it would show our strategy. However, we risk never learning the rules and when the game ends abruptly there will be no winner. If you break all the rules you lose the game by default.