General ideas for great first date

This powerful first date idea is pretty standard. Yet still very effective.

When you meet a girl at friendrfinder for coffee or drinks it gives you a chance to talk in a very casual manner. It has far less pressure than sitting facing each other from across the table at fancy restaurants. Since confidence is important part of a good first date it gives you a chance to get a lot more comfortable with the girl and therefore seem far more confident rather than putting too much strain too fast on yourself.

Even better it is also situation that you can begin to establish physical contact. Meeting the girl for coffee or drinks on your first date means that youre able to do a little bit of flirting and insert some steps to help build attraction during your conversation.  These little initial steps towards attraction go a long way towards building a hopefully lasting an intimate relationship.

By playing games I did not mean play some sort of mind games with the girl.  I mean what it sounds like, play actual games.  Take her to miniature golf, the Boardwalk,  a pool hall, a video arcade or anywhere where there are games to be played.

There should be little pressure to be ”fun” on this date because the venue itself should provide a fair amount of fun. This takes a lot of pressure off of you on the first date.  You get to enjoy your time with our be a little competitive and hopefully approach her in a playful slightly teasing manner thereby heightening her attraction.

Im not talking about sex. At least not yet.

Im talking but doing actual physical activity. This one can depend upon the girl. Doing a physical activity is not for all girls. But many, if not most, of them will enjoy some sort of physical activity for a date.  For great first date activity try to take the girl on a hike, ice-skating, rollerblading or even a nice walk along the beach or through a park.  These physical activities can often be a least expensive and the most rewarding ways to have a great first date.

Once youre on the first date there are a few unwritten rules you should follow.  None of these are set in stone, there may certainly be reasons to break down and be correct in doing so, but as a rule of thumb you would be wise to follow all of these first date tips.

The biggest thing most guys do wrong is simply worrying about trying to be too perfect.  I will admit it is very important to make a good first impression.  But when you worry too much about every single word or action you actually work against making a good pressure.  By trying to be perfect you seem to be more indecisive and controlling.  A bad combination.

Put a first date is proper place. If you followed my previous instructions youre not spending too much money on the date. If it goes badly youve only wasted little bit of time and money. And if it goes well you have a wonderful time and a great woman to take out on future dates.

Dont worry about which one of these will be.  Go out and try to have fun.  Be enjoyable and energetic.  If you in the girl do not match, do not worry about it, try again with another girl.

By relaxing and not worrying about the outcome of the date youre actually able to converse much more healthy and casual manner in your confidence will seems far higher than if you worry over every little bit of conversation. A first date will either work or it wont work, theres no way to try to force it.

First Date Rule #2- Limit your Time

guys who try to plan out a lab or it can complicated first dates that a girl will remember forever is almost dooming himself to failure.  You should never approach a date thinking that this is going to be something that your future wife is going to be talking about 20 years down the line at your anniversary.  Those stores will build themselves.  This is the reality.  You may have hundreds of first dates before you find the “right” woman for you.

The purpose of the first date is not to create some romantic “Cinderella” type atmosphere and sweep a woman off her feet.  The purpose is to prove to her that you are somebody that she wants to spend time with and for her to spend enough time with you to know whether you wish to spend more time with her.  That is it.

A first date should be simple and relatively short.

Your best first date should be something low key and fun and only lasting for a limited period of time. This way you do not waste too much of your time and money and neither does she.

If the date is going well many guys will think that is exception to this rule, and will want to pile on more events.  This is also wrong.  By leaving her after the date that has been going very well you create a situation where she wants to see you again. That is very important.  If you give her too much time she can actually begin to get a little bit bored with you and leave with some negative feelings rather than more positive feelings.  Any great actor or any decent “dater” should always know to leave them wanting more.

First Date Rule #3  Have fun and Flirt

Your first date may be short but you want to pack a lot into it.  One of the most important things to make sure that is included in your date are chances the build a rapport with the woman.

Heres why building a rapport and flirting with the woman is essential…

If there is not attraction on a date, it will go nowhere.  She may like you, but not ”like” you.  That is the horrible, “friend” zone.  Where she likes you as a person but there is absolutely zero sexual attraction between the two.  Often this comes from your initial contact going the wrong way.  Rather than flirting and starting things on the path towards a sexual basis you try to be too nice and any relationship ended up on a purely, “friend” basis.

Try treating all women like your bratty little sister. Teasing her just a little bit, but showing that there is affection behind the teasing.  This will make a woman feel you have a lot of confidence and also put her in a position where she slightly wants to impress you. Just remember that there is a fine line between “teasing” and “making fun” of the girl.  (Again, this is part of sexual tension.)

Well that has been a lot of First date information for you.  Im only halfway done with these first date tips that I should give you a break now to digest what youve read.


Why Rules Aren’t Always Meant To Be Broken

In the last few years, a number of self-proclaimed “bibles for dating” claim to have discovered “simple rules” to follow in order to land a man and keep him have sold like hotcakes to the female demographic. In response, a number of self-help handbooks have been written for men to exploit “the rules” taught to women and twist them around to their own advantage. Sounds like an unholy war replete with espionage, counter-espionage, tactical manoeuvres, hostages taken, prisoners liberated and of course, one side or the other becoming the ultimate victor. There’s just one problem: isn’t the point of dating to share some of your life with someone, not deceitfully win some sort of unseen battle?
I know, I know, we didn’t start the fire. Regardless, we are in the here and now, where gender roles have been turned on their heads. We’re still clinging desperately to old ideas about men and women in the hopes of better understanding the opposite sex. The problem is times change faster than the attitudes of most people and what may be politically correct isn’t always what people realistically want. The other problem is that somewhere along the way, we have confused being the same with being equal. Without delving into a great philosophical debate, it’s pretty obvious that as much as men and women may be equal, they will never be the same. It’s kind of what seems to make the world go around. You can’t have your black without white or even the chance of developing some grey areas in between without there being some strong contrasting colours.
Admitting that men and women are different is the first step. Realizing that it is easier to understand people like us than people who are different is the second step. Not very politically correct to admit either as fact, but that’s only because we also seem to confuse acceptance and respect with understanding. I will never understand quantum theory, but I still acknowledge its existence and respect the scientific advances that have resulted from its study. So it is with man and woman and in reality each individual in this world, you may never fully understand one another, but that doesn’t mean you can’t respect and accept each other.
Let’s get back to the often-maligned rules. Dating is sometimes thought of as a game, hence the idea of there being rules. How many profiles start out by saying how the person, male or female, doesn’t like to play games? Here in lies the ruse. Saying you don’t play games is already playing the game. There is no escaping it. Your only option is to understand it a bit and then to learn to respect and accept it. As children, why do we play games? Ideally it’s not supposed to be to win, but rather it teaches us to interact with other children in a healthy and productive manner. The best players are as good at winning as they are at losing. The best daters accept rejection as well as attraction.
That is the point of the game in dating. It’s not to win or lose, but it’s supposed to facilitate social communication with a complete stranger. Having rules is merely a way to let both parties know in advance what the next move in the process should be. One reason people lose at games is they don’t know the rules them. Too many times, we don’t ask other people what they expect or reveal to them our next move since we worry that it would show our strategy. However, we risk never learning the rules and when the game ends abruptly there will be no winner. If you break all the rules you lose the game by default.